Day: January 24, 2003

So, after an eventful evening of watching Monty Python, mixing Russian and British alchohol, and eating reheated stuffed artichokes, what possibly, you ask, could make things more eventful? I’ll answer that! Watching whoever sits at the shitty little Mount Vernon Public Access TV station programming thier events through next week. We watched it life; complete with mispellings of Jeus and Liyteracy. Quite possibly the best thing I’ve seen on TV. Ever.

Written by Mark Levinthal & Bill Manspeaker

Why don’t you sit right back
and I, I may tell you a tale
a tale of three little pigs
and a BIG BAD wolf

Well the first little piggy
well he was kind of hip he
spent most of his day just
dreaming on the city

and then one day he bought a guitar
he moved to hollywood
to become a star
living on the farm
he knew nothing of the city
built his house on straw – what a pity
then one day
jamming on some cords
along came the wolf
knocking on his door

Little pig, little pig, let me in
“not by the hair of my chinny chin chin”
Little pig, little pig, let me in
“not by the hair of my chinny chin chin”
well i’m huffing, i’m puffing
I’ll blow your house in
Huffing, Puffing,
blow your house in
Huffing, Puffing,
blow your house in
Huffing and I’m puffing, and I’ll blow your house in

well the second little piggy
well, he was kind of stocky
spent most of his day
just a gun just smoking

huffing and a phuffing down the venize beach
getting paid money for religious speech
built his shelter from many garbage picks
mostly made up of cans and sticks
then one day he was cracking off a Marley
along came the wolf on his big bad Harley

Little pig, Little pig, let me in
not by the hair of my chinny chin chin x2
well i’m huffing, i’m puffing
I’ll blow your house in
Huffing, puffing,
blow your house in
Huffing, puffing
blow your house in
Huffing and I’m puffing, and I’ll blow your house in

well the third little piggy
the great A student
his daddy was a rock-star
named Pig Nugent
earned his masters degree
from Harvard college
built his house from his architect knowledge
a tri-level mansion Hollywood Hills
daddy rockstart ’em
pay for the bills
then one day came the old house matcher
the big bad wolf, the little piggies slasher

Little pig, little pig, let me in
not by the hair of my chinny chin chin x2
well i’m huffing, i’m puffing
I’ll blow your house in
Huffing, puffing,
blow your house in
Huffing, puffing,
blow your house in
Huffing and I’m puffing, and I’ll blow your house in

well the big bad wolf
well he huffed
and he puffed all that he could
and hold, behold the little piggy house stood
it’s made out of concrete
the little piggy shouted
the wolf just frowned as he pouted
so they called nine eleven
like any piggy would
they sent out rambo
just as fast as they could

{Rambo: } yo! Wolf-face, i’m your worst nightmare
{Rambo: } your ass is mine

well the wolf fell dead as you
can plainly see
and thats the end of the story for you and me
it still gives a lesson, you just may
hear the big wolf the little piggies say:

Little pig, Little pig, let me in
not by the hair of my chinny chin chin x2
well i’m huffing, i’m puffing
I’ll blow your house in
Huffing, puffing, blow your house in
Huffing, puffing, blow your house in
Huffing, puffing, blow your house in
Huffing and I’m puffing, and I’ll blow your house in

My office is still hot as anything. But, my co-worker appears to be out today. Thats always good, because it means that I can be uberprroductive with toonage cranked.

Lets hear it for productivity!

1. American film actor, born 1956, star of “Forrest Gump” and
“Saving Private Ryan”.

2. Welsh singer, born 1940, real name Thomas Woodward, described
by a columnist as “sweat personified”.

3. 12th-century English saint and martyr, murdered in Canterbury
Cathedral in 1170.

4. American singer, songwriter and actor, born 1949. His albums
include “Rain Dogs” and “Swordfishtrombones”, and his films
include “Short Cuts” and “Ironweed”.

5. English statesman and cardinal (c1475-1530) who dominated
Henry VIII’s government.

6. American journalist and novelist, born 1931, author of “The
Bonfire of the Vanities” and “The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test”.

7. English statesman (1478-1535) who wrote “Utopia” and became
the patron saint of politicians.

8. A Harvard professor of mathematics who became famous in the
1950s for his satirical songs.

9. Czech-born British dramatist, born 1937, author of “Jumpers”
and “Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead”.

10. The leading singer and songwriter in Zimbabwe, known as
“The Lion of Zimbabwe”, who in 1998 recorded “We Are Slaves
in Our Country”.