EGO: \u201cSelf-Esteem where are you? Helloooo\u2026It\u2019s me the Ego, you know\u2026 the Self, I coordinate operations from the Frontal Lobes. Self-Esteem, we need you on board, or the entire enterprise shuts down. Self-Respect may be curled up in the fetal position in the subconscious, but Self-Respect didn\u2019t just close down operations and disappear. Self-Respect says he\u2019s on board if we can get you\u2026Self Esteem\u2026back on board. And I appreciate Self-Respect\u2019s resilience, but hey, Self-Respect\u2026easy on the Ben and Jerry\u2019s. I mean, have some\u2026er\u2026of yourself\u2026for crissakes.\u201d <\/p>\n
\u201cLast night with Sally was difficult for all of us. But again everyone is blaming everyone. I\u2019m not sure what happened to Penis. Penis is refusing to talk about the events of last night. I spoke to Libido, Libido says that Drive was there. I have confirmation from Endocrine System that Drive was indeed there. Sexual Prowess and Penis report that everything is in working order. Reason blames the beer goggles. Penis blames Libido, Libido blames Penis. The Limbic System weighed in and blames the Prozac. I\u2019ve put a call into the Vascular System to find out what went wrong. Vascular System says he\u2019ll get back to me as soon as our blood pressure is under control. Another thing we really need to talk about is the alcohol intake. Even Stomach is complaining. Reason says the level of intoxication may be to blame for Penis\u2019s erectile dysfunction.\u201d <\/p>\n
PENIS: \u201cHey gimme a break\u2026that was a first for me\u2026It\u2019s been a rough night. And Damn it, if I hadn\u2019t taken such a beating from Right Hand all week, maybe I would have been up for it\u2026so to speak.\u201d <\/p>\n
RIGHT HAND: \u201cRepresentin\u2019 Yo\u2026\u201d <\/p>\n
EGO: \u201cShut up Right Hand!\u201d <\/p>\n
EGO: \u201cPenis, I fully understand your dissatisfaction with Liver\u2019s ability to metabolize the alcohol. I called Liver and asked him what was going on. Liver responded \u201cCaptain, the dilithium crystals are overheated, I\u2019m just a Liver, not a Doctor.\u201d\u2026Ahem\u2026Clearly Liver is still struggling to process the alcohol. Liver are you OK down there? <\/p>\n
LIVER: \u201chic\u201d <\/p>\n
EGO: \u201cOK\u2026We\u2019ll just have to be patient. And Stomach and Mouth you can help Liver out significantly. We all saw you do those Tequila shots while Concentration and Reason we\u2019re preoccupied trying to sound smart talking about world events with that hot TV producer. What was her name again?\u201d <\/p>\n
MEMORY: \u201cAnna\u2026you dipshit!\u201d <\/p>\n
EGO: \u201cRight.\u201d <\/p>\n
EGO: \u201cHey everyone. Listen up\u2026Quiet please\u2026Pride, Wit, Charm, quiet down. We\u2019ve got to stop the blame game. It\u2019s rumored that Self-Esteem was blaming Vanity just before vanishing into the subconscious. I spoke to Vanity, Vanity say he\u2019s never been better. The white teeth, the Grecian Formula, the workouts, especially the sit-ups. Vanity is doing everything he can possibly do. And Mouth and Stomach, you guys could really help Vanity by eating less crap. Willpower says he\u2019s at the breaking point, and that the potato chips are too irresistible. I think we’re all tired of the “you can\u2019t have just one\u201d excuse we keep hearing from Stomach and Mouth. Cut back on the chips OK. Damn, I mean between the beer and the chips, you\u2019re not helping. You need to get back on track.\u201d <\/p>\n
ASS: \u201cHey Mouth and Stomach, try eating a fucking salad once in a while? I\u2019m dying down here.\u201d <\/p>\n
EGO: \u201cOK folks\u2026big date tonight with Minerva. If we have to do this without Self-Esteem, then so be it. We had to do it once before, and if Pointer Finger had just checked to make sure our fly was zipped up I think we would have scored.\u201d <\/p>\n
LEFT HAND: \u201cWe\u2019ll that\u2019s what you get for relying on Right Hand all the time.” <\/p>\n
RIGHT HAND: \u201cDon’t be hatin’.\u201d <\/p>\n
EGO: \u201cOK\u2026let\u2019s go out there tonight and charm her pants off. CHARM! Do you hear me?\u201d <\/p>\n
CHARM: \u201cAnything you say sweetheart.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
EGO: \u201cSelf-Esteem where are you? Helloooo\u2026It\u2019s me the Ego, you know\u2026 the Self, I coordinate operations from the Frontal Lobes. Self-Esteem, we need you on<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"chat","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[16],"class_list":["post-386","post","type-post","status-publish","format-chat","hentry","tag-tired","post_format-post-format-chat"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/delascabezas.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/386","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/delascabezas.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/delascabezas.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/delascabezas.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/delascabezas.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=386"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/delascabezas.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/386\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2959,"href":"https:\/\/delascabezas.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/386\/revisions\/2959"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/delascabezas.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=386"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/delascabezas.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=386"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/delascabezas.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=386"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}